The Magic Word is Trust
Summary
How do we build genuine relationships with our cross-functional partners? How does that improve decision-making and build honest collaboration? We do it by building our trust muscle! Start by assuming good intentions, and then truly involve everyone in the design process. Working together builds trust and fosters strong relationships. And the more trust we build, the more we are able to have healthy debates, prompting us to better and better solutions. Because we trust that we all want the same results, we can be clear and direct with each other, and finally, we can be brutal prioritizers because we’ve spent a lot of time building our relationships. Trust is magic!
Key Insights
-
•
Building genuine relationships at work improves collaboration, decision making, and product outcomes.
-
•
Trust is cultivated through knowing coworkers personally, like their families and hobbies.
-
•
The 'three in a box' approach aligns product, design, and engineering for cohesive solutions.
-
•
Assuming good intent makes disagreements less personal and encourages open communication.
-
•
Bringing your whole self to work, including quirks and emotions, fosters authenticity and workplace happiness.
-
•
Tailoring communication styles to different audience types (analytical, amiable, expressive, driver) improves understanding and buy-in.
-
•
People outside design also make design decisions; expanding the definition of your design team leads to better products.
-
•
Feedback should focus on problem solving, not personal preference, and requires emotional control.
-
•
Debate is essential for pushing ideas forward if it stays respectful and issue-focused.
-
•
Introverts can excel by leveraging listening skills and building strong one-on-one relationships.
Notable Quotes
"The key is of course trust, but in my house the magic word is please."
"Just because they have a different opinion doesn’t mean they’re bad people."
"Work is your real life. Friendships make the office a safe, happy, fun place to be."
"Bring people along on a journey. Lead people towards your side by focusing on the future state."
"People outside of your design organization are making design decisions; they are also designers."
"Feedback isn’t about liking. Helpful feedback needs to be, is this solving your problem or not."
"Debate isn’t a bad thing. Challenging each other’s thinking helps you find a better approach."
"Most introverts are really good about cultivating personal relationships and listening."
"Kill them with kindness. Be professional no matter how you’re feeling."
"When we have genuine relationships and we trust each other, it leads to so much goodness."
Or choose a question:
More Videos
"I believe that 50% of white-collar jobs are just going away in the next 5 to 10 years."
Nathan Shedroff Hugh Dubberly Thomas J. McLeishHow Will Design be Taught When the Schools Shut Down?
May 8, 2026
"Our mission is to raise the overall value of design in the Philippines where it’s often seen as an expense item."
John Paul de Guzman10k Screens Later: How We Became a Data-Driven Design Organization
September 24, 2024
"Survey data should be treated as zero-party data that fuels personalized communications and lifecycle marketing."
Aleksandra Korczynska Caroline Jarrett Justyna ParmeeSurvey Tools
March 12, 2026
"Sustainable and flexible work tactics are key to navigating constant change without burnout."
Kristin SkinnerTheme 2: Introduction and Provocation
January 8, 2024
"Workshop content is equivalent to a one-day in-person event spread over 10 virtual hours with coaching and support."
Rachael Dietkus, LCSW Victor Udoewa Jennifer StricklandEverything You Need to Know about the Civic Design 2022 Call for Presentations
May 17, 2022
"Tradecraft is the making stuff, stagecraft is a kind of cross-functional therapy, and statecraft is organizational diplomacy."
Uday GajendarThe Rise of Meta-Design: A Starter Playbook
May 19, 2022
"Feedback is a lot like holding up a mirror. You're reflecting what's already working and like using a flashlight to hide in the corners."
Vanessa VarinFeedback: The Other F-Word
September 10, 2025
"We are moving from direct work to mediated work, from wanting things perfect to good enough for now, and from complete to adaptive and growing systems."
Hugh DubberlyProblems with Problems: Reconsidering the Frame of Designing as Problem-Solving
June 19, 2019
"Research wasn’t meant to be a silo. It was meant to be a guiding function, a system for creating shared knowledge that drives better decisions."
Sean McKayCoexisting with non-researchers: Practical strategies for a democratized research future
March 11, 2025