Cross-Functional Relationship Design
Summary
Key Insights
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Harvard Business Review finds 75% of cross-functional teams are dysfunctional due to persistent silos.
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Cross-functional relationships often fail due to competing priorities, differing communication styles, and lack of shared goals.
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Relationships at work cycle through connection, disconnection, and repair, similar to a breathing process.
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Connection happens when people feel seen, heard, and valued, which boosts collaboration and motivation.
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Disconnection leads to treating people as obstacles or tools, increasing conflict and lowering productivity.
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Repair attempts, including simple apologies or appreciation, prevent negativity from spiraling and restore connection.
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Mapping your top five cross-functional relationships on the connection-disconnection-repair cycle reveals blind spots and opportunities.
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The Enneagram personality system dramatically improves cross-functional understanding, trust, and communication.
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Designing explicit relationship agreements (designed alliances) clarifies expectations and conflict management, improving teamwork.
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Leadership must protect time for connection-building; otherwise, teams remain disconnected and inefficient.
Notable Quotes
"75% of cross-functional teams are dysfunctional because silos perpetuate themselves, even in cross-functional teams."
"Work gets done through our relationships, and that becomes more true the higher you go in your career."
"A relationship cycles through connection, disconnection, and repair, just like breathing has an inhale and an exhale."
"Connection is the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued."
"Disconnection is the breeding ground for conflict."
"When people feel disconnected, they start to objectify others as obstacles or vehicles to get work done."
"Repair is any action that prevents negativity from spiraling out of control and helps bring people back to connection."
"The quickest way I found to create connection is through the Enneagram personality assessment."
"Designed alliances make explicit the implicit ways our relationships work and how it feels to be engaged with them."
"You don’t have time not to build connections; the lack of connection is why everything is taking longer."
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